katbeckman

Making fitness fun! Classpass is a great option!

As I’m getting older, my physical health has bubbled up as a big priority… one that requires attention. Consistent attention. A friend invited me to workout with her using a new subscription service. I’m typically not a fan of subscription services, so I was skeptical. But I’m so glad I pushed through and tried anyway!! Classpass has been exciting, challenging, and a huge shift in my physical body!

What is Classpass? It’s a service that lets you take classes at hundreds of different gyms in your area with just one signup, and zero pressure! I always disliked the 30 minute pressure talk I’d get going into a new gym before they’d even let me work out! None of this with Classpass! Most places you just click the button that you are there and sign their waiver. That’s it. Friendly people, I’ve been to at least 12 different studios in the last 6 weeks, have only been greeted warmly and zero pressure to join any of them.

How does it work? Signup and you get credits. The $9 plan ($30 off with my link) gets you 21 credits that you can spend however & at whatever studio you want, this month.

If you dont like details, skip to the next paragraph! If you do, read on… For example, I like Yoga for example; I limited my studio search to just Plano, Allen, and Richardson and 7 studios come up. They range in points per class, from only 1 point up to 6 points. As you’d expect a big box place like Golds Yoga is only 1-2 points. Yoga Chikitsa, a cute little studio at Collins & Campbell is only 2 points (been there 3 times already!), Krav Yoga 2-3, Vibe Yoga 3, The Yoga Factory 4, Yogafit 5, Gaia Flow 6 points. This means you could visit 6 of these 7 your first month, if you want to try a bunch of different places.

Each studio lists their classes, most have a fairly detailed description. If you want a relaxation yoga class, to help you unwind and de-stress, then pick that one. If you want a “power” exercise sweat yoga, then you can choose that instead!

You can visit a studio up to 3 times per month, without the points increasing.

If you love pilates toys, like I do, visit the studios that have reformers, chairs, towers, etc. BodyBar fitness is Amazing (pick a class with Dena) and varies in points, I always book when they are 3-4 points. Studio6 also has 4 point Reformer and Reformer lite classes (if you havent done it before, this is a very good first class).

The idea is to make exercise enjoyable again! Be in a space that motivates you to be your best self! I’ve noticed my body and my attitude change these past 2 months!! Do it for yourself! Stretch

Barre classes are another fun, low impact exercise that I’ve tried several times. Barre3 in Richardson is always 4 points, Barre3 in Plano is 5. Barre Code is 4. So you could do 5 barre classes, or of course, mix the classes up. That’s what I do.

I don’t want to commit to one specialized gym, as I love yoga and barre and reformer, so this is a plan that is perfect for me! They have cycling and crossfit and boxing and tons of other stuff to try too. Oh BTW, I did a surfboard class last Saturday – that was a hoot! 😉 If you want to give it try, it is only $9. If you want to cancel, just do it 3 days before it renews. I’m actually paying full price my second month, so that shows you how much I truly like it. 😉 Use my link to get your first month for only $9. http://class.ps/lO9va

Love & Light & Amazing Health too,

Kat

Releasing Grudges

Today I’ve been pondering the idea of grudges. I view them in the same vein as complaining… a waste of time & energy. Change it or let it go.

Basically there are 3 *useful* choices to address anything you’d want to hold a grudge about.

Talk to the person or organization that upset you and fully clear the air. While this is the cleanest and most rewarding option, it’s likely the most difficult, as few people enjoy confrontation.
Decide that its not really worth holding a grudge over and fully forgive whoever hurt you. *This is different than stuff it down, ignore it!* If you find that you are still thinking about the issue, then you haven’t fully felt it and forgiven it. Fully feel the hurt and pain & let it go. If its still not gone, see #1, or decide to go with #3.
Decide that the issue is not worth any more effort resolving and end the relationship. When you choose this option, you are choosing to accept the current result, and move on.

Ok, so how do you go about these options.

For #1. Assume their best intent. If someone says they want to talk with you, and then attacks you… then its not going to end well. So put yourself in their position. What possible good, no matter how unlikely it seems, could they have been thinking or doing. Approach the situation from an open, “help me understand”, perspective. Be as positive or at least non-emotional as you can be.

Sometimes I have this conversation in my head without the other person there, and it is enough to get me to Option 2.

#2. Feel the hurt, imagine yourself as a small child, one that is allowed to get upset and cry, even about something small. Let the hurt out. At the same time, imagine yourself also as adult you – like in the movies where there are 2 versions of yourself. Have “adult you” hold and support “little you” while you wail and scream and fully feel ALL the hurt and pain. Once the child is done expressing the pain, re-evaluate the situation. Can it now be truly forgiven and moved past? If yes, congrats, a good cry can really help. You are ready to “adult” again. If not, are you ready to move to #1 – calmly talk it out or #3 – move on from the relationship.

#3. The truth is, relationships end, friendships end. There’s a reason, a season, or a lifetime, to relationships. This may be one of those that was for a reason or a season. And that’s ok. You get to choose. Again, when you choose this option, you no longer get to be upset, angry, talk bad about the other person or organization, or any other emotion. It’s now neutral. If it’s not, circle back to options #1 or #2. If you are ready to let it go, forgive yourself for any failings on your part and on their part. Wish them only the best. If you think of them or interact with them in any way in the future, it is from a neutral to positive mindset.

Releasing your upset – in whatever form it is taking, and increasing your emotional stability will truly make you a calmer, happier, more creative person. And that’s my wish for you, for all of us.

Balancing “above the minimum” without creating “thieves”

Over and over, as if it was new information, connection keeps showing up as the lesson. We may think we are close, connected with others, only to find out they may not feel the same. The difficulty is that everyone has different expectations of what equals a true connection – for them. While we can have relationship where you don’t see friends for years and it is like no time has passed; for people you can see on a regular basis, I believe there are is a foundation to close connection – reciprocation in some form.

At work, if your employee shows up and you pay them, and that’s it, what is the result? They give the minimum, you give the minimum, and then you get the minimum from them. They may even start coming in less, or looking for a new job. Just to tell someone, “you get paid” isn’t enough to keep people truly satisfied in their work. It’s not just about money, it’s about feeling connected, needed.

This is true in friendships as well. When both sides give the minimum or one side feels they are always giving and not receiving above the minimum in return, the relationship may diminish, suffer or fail. The funny/ not so funny thing is, we tend to wear blinders and say, “I’m always the one giving” or “No one is reaching out to me”.

Its easy to see ourselves as perfect and everyone else as owing us. There’s an expression similar to: We judge ourselves based on our best intentions and others based on their worst actions.

Some questions to ponder:

Are you reaching out consistently in some way?

We all have different skills. Some are “party planners”, some are not. Some are “gift givers”, some are not. Reciprocation isn’t an exact one for one. Anyone can invite another over for a cup of coffee/tea. No cost, no cleaning needed. Or text, “Hey can I drop by your house / coffee shop, so we can catch up?” Consider that you may not be giving above the minimum to the people you are being hurt by. If you want to be closer, reach out. (If you are good where your relationships currently are, even if you aren’t reaching out, then that’s ok, too.)

On the flip side, Are you giving too much (without their request), then “making the other person a thief”?

If you’ve been told, “Wow, that is so thoughtful!” as people have happily, repeatedly taken gifts with no mention of reciprocation – you’ve likely exceeded your maximum. To continue to over-give then causes resentment for the giver. The receiver likely isn’t even aware you are upset- you’ve made them into a thief. You may be on the opposite side with some relationships – over the maximum – the flipside of below the minimum! This can be damaging to relationships as well. See if giving less makes you happier in that relationship.

Are you asking/requiring things the other person can’t give you?

You many wish to change your expectations and/or behavior to avoid continuing to be hurt. That person may never be able to give you what you were asking for. Is what they are able to give you enough?

Are you actually reaching out to “everyone”, or just investing in one or two people who have let you down?

Again, its easy to see ourselves as amazing and generalize it to everyone. Taking a step back and being objective about what has really occurred may provide insight.

Service, Selfless giving, donations, charity – all great things when giving with a open heart. The issue comes if your giving or your expectation causes you pain.

Love & Light,

Kat

Community and Connection

This year, I committed to reaching out more and building community. We don’t have biological family here in Texas, so our friends are our community.

In coaching, we talk about Happiness coming from within. While that is true, lack of social connections is counter-productive to Happiness as well.

If you rated your Overall Happiness on a 1 to 10, what number would you give it? As you were thinking of that number, what justifications instantly ran through you head?!?! Happiness at Work, with Significant other, with Family, with Friends, with Yourself, your Body, Finances?

Some of these situations just require a calm acceptance, others a change….and the wisdom to know the difference 🙂

Community and Connection is one area where we can make a change. Volunteer your time. Whether it be at a church, a school, scouts, food pantry, anywhere! Many of my friends now are from the kids PTA group! Be generous with your time, your home, offer what you have. I started hosting a monthly craft get together and invite most of the local moms, all are welcome. I love this fun bonding time!

A friend sent me a meme that I thought was great. It said to have 3 hobbies: One that keeps you fit, one that makes you money, and one that feeds your creativity! I might add a fourth – one where you volunteer your time/resource. All of these feed connections and the soul!

Where can you connect?

Love & Light,
Kat

Big Picture

It’s easy to get pulled into the day-to-day, the solve-able problems, and forget to put effort into what is truly important.

Stop for a minute and reflect,then make a list:

#1. What is truly important in your life?

…

Your list may include family, spirituality/religion, friendships, health, and more.

Now make a second list :

#2: Where you spend much of your free time?

…..

Does your 2nd list closely match your 1st?

If yes, Excellent! If not, let’s create a 3rd list.

#3: What specific actions can you take in the next day, week, or month, to support each of the items on your “Truly Important” list.

….

Some ideas could be: Date night, scheduled for Saturday. Visit with old Friend, scheduled for 3 weeks from Sunday, etc.

Your Lists are unique to you. Be gentle with yourself, you may not be able to do everything this week.

Start putting your energy into what is important to you!

Ready for retirement? Start in your 20s!

We went to the RV show this past weekend, and now retirement, and the concept of “Time Value of Money”, is on the brain! How do you best make your $$ work for you?!

As a 20 year old, you’re just starting out and retirement seems a world away. This is actually the BEST time to start saving for your retirement!! With your very first job, start putting 10-20% of your income into savings or preferably 401k. If you start when you are used to living like a poor college student, or just a poor kid in general, you won’t miss 10 or 20% of the income, when you get a bigger job.

If you are already in your 30s or older, and haven’t started saving for retirement, and are struggling to cover all your bills already, start putting 5% or whatever you can away, then increase the amount year over year.

Your investment will typically double at least every 10 years, so the earlier you start, the more you will have put in, in principle, and the more times it will double. If your company offers any type of 401k matching, definitely take advantage of that, too.

This book is dated, but it was amazing helpful when we started out: Money: An Owners Manual, A Personal Guide to Financial Freedom. It makes money management seem pretty simple, and when you follow the recommendations, it is.

The time to plan for retirement, is NOW! You’ll be thankful you started planning and investing early!

$ for Nothing

Looking for some extra dough, to cover your tax bill, or just in general?

Take a second look at your recurring payments. You may be able to get exactly or comparably, the same services, for much less $$.

1. What’s your biggest monthly expense? For most, it’s a Mortgage. Being the biggest expense, it has the potential for biggest savings. So it may be worth the effort to refinance. If you’re at over 5%, definitely consider it. Get an estimate of all charges before committing.

2. Home & Car insurance – These rates go up each year. Ours went up $50/month, so we switched companies and received comparable coverage for $80/month less.

3. Utilities – Electricity is typically a 1 year contract, and after 12 months, the rate significantly increases. One year,we reduced from 14 to 8 cents/kwh, saving us hundreds a month. https://www.texaselectricrates.com Also, shop around for other bills like TV/Internet, etc. Just by asking, Verizon reduced the bill by $25/month. And if your cell bill is over $50/month all inclusive, you can do better. Ptel.com is still a favorite, only $5/month, for those who seldom text/call and use only WIFI.

4. Health Care Costs – If your doctor prescribes an Rx that is expensive, push back. Call the Dr and ask for an alternative medicine. Doctors sometimes prescribe the newest drugs, that they receive samples for. Our cost went from $954 to $30, just by asking for an alternative. If you’ve been prescribed the least expensive Rx, check out websites like Goodrx.com for coupons to use instead of insurance. Goodrx tells the exact price you will pay.

5. Pay your credit cards off every month. (If that’s not possible, switch to a card with the lowest possible APR or consider a bank loan instead.) If you do pay your credit cards every month, get cards with rewards. We are big Disney fans and have earned enough Chase Disney Reward points to pay for hotel and park admission for our next trip! (Don’t use this card if you don’t pay it off every month, the APR is over 13%.)

6. For repairs, get 3 estimates and tell each supplier, I’m getting 3 estimates. We had a pest issue and the first estimate was for $7,500! The 2nd supplier knew who the first supplier was (ie,apparently known for extreme overcharging) and gave us an estimate of $1,500. The 3rd supplier gave us a more appropriate solution and a reasonable price of $475! Yes, true story.

This one isn’t an identical same swap, like the 6 above are, but still worth considering:

7. Eating out. While its easier and quicker to eat out, consider breakfast and coffee at home, packing a lunch, and/or dinner planning. Home cooking is typically healthier and almost always less expensive. Google “freezer meals” for great prep ahead ideas. If you have food ready, its much easier to eat in!

These recurring savings, add up to thousands of dollars each year!

What else are you buying regularly? Can you save on it?

These were my top ideas; want more ideas? Google “money saving tips” and find hundreds more!

Happy $$$!

Healthy Eating Finds: Quest Bars

I’ve been wanting to eat healthy; however I want it to be easy, and inexpensive and just be simple. 🙂 I truly could do the steel cut oats, sweet potatoes, raw vegetables, kale, fish, granola diet… however….my family would likely disown me, if that’s all I gave them. So I’m working those items in, along with other foods.

My younger son was eating a protein bar Every morning, and sometimes he ate another in the afternoon. When I actually looked what he was eating, it was full of artificial foods and soy. So I went on a hunt to find a better bar. We ended up with Quest bars. No soy, stevia sweetened AND he loves the taste. It was a double win, that some YouTuber that he watches, endorses them too. So they are more healthy and cool! We visited Dr Rob Parker the other day, and guess what is sitting on his reception counter, instead of candy? Yep, Quest bars.

The cheapest I’ve found them is on drugstore.com. Eric loves the Cookie Dough. I prefer the Cookies and Cream. Another winner is the Cinnamon Bun. We also got a multi-pack off Amazon and tried 12 different flavors.

http://www.drugstore.com/questbar-protein-bars-cookies-and-cream/qxp523559?catid=326472 $24.99 no tax or shipping. Plus you earn $1.25 in drugstore.com $.

Consider these if you are not eating breakfast, eating some other bar for breakfast or a snack, or just want to try something new that seems pretty healthy and tasty!

What’s next?

Have you ever noticed … some people live their life day to day (d2d), and seem to be just fine, while others live for a greater purpose or looking forward to something?

In the d2d group, there seems to be 2 categories. 1. Those just getting by, too busy handling the stress of the now, to look beyond. And 2. Those truly content, living in the now, knowing it will all work out. I suspect the majority of adults fall in category #1 and the majority of kids in #2.

I’m starting to wonder if the mid-life crisis, teenage angst, and post-high school/not wanting to or ready for college crises, come from the lack of purpose. As a 40-something, we’ve likely completed school, gotten married (maybe more than once), bought the house(s) and cars, had kid(s), and are then saying “now what?”. The teenagers may be asking all the existential questions- still on the order of, why?, what’s my purpose? And those getting out of high school, unclear of their future path, are in a similar situation… not knowing what’s next? what’s my purpose?

Some are able to find their purpose in their work, others in their religion or spirituality. For others its volunteering or other activities.

For example, for my hubby, it’s Boy Scouts and Boy Scout trips: planning, getting in shape for expeditions, buying equipment. He loves volunteering and the high adventure. This feeds his soul.

I’d love to be part of the first group — d2d part #2, totally content in the now, in the moment, fully appreciating my current reality. If I was truly there, then maybe that vision/future wouldnt be necessary. Since I’m flawed and human, I still sometimes re-live the past and worry about the future. I’m working on being content with the now, AND planning for the future.

Where am I going with this?… What’s your vision? Your goal(s)? Short term? Long term? What do you look forward to? What gets you out of bed? This future focus, helps us feel connected, in the now. Having answers to these questions might help avoid the crises.

Opinions

Today I’ve been thinking about Opinions… we’ve all got them…

If someone asks me directly, “What’s your opinion on x”, I’ll give it, I have an opinion on most things, typically with the adder “for me”. eg, “This is what I think is best in this situation, for me”. Why the adder? Because everyone is different! Shocking news, right?! Well… some forget that important fact. And, my advice, might be different, when applied to you, or someone else.

Really internalizing the “everyone is different” and “what’s right for everyone, is different”, has helped me to stay composed in situations where, in the past, I might have engaged and gotten upset.

If I truly think someone is making a mistake, I will engage, and calmly walk through their thought process with them. Maybe *I* was missing a piece of information. Maybe their answer truly was best for them. Maybe they think it through more fully and change their mind.

Being open, skipping the right/wrong, and just listening to understand, can allow us to gain information, and to help each other, get to a better solution.